Cup Stacking

Perseverance…

Designing a database

For those folk who just migrated from front-end to back-end, seriously think through how you can design your shit and pack them up tight. Some pitfall that will utterly go back and kill yourself or your employees refactoring codes in the future:

  • Always prefer an array over some fucked up object with keys name that make no fuck sense such as:
   {
     "one" : "fuck",
     "two" : "you",
     "three": "dev"
   }

Seriously, if you want to count with words, why not put a fucking picture of a number there? It’s easy, like this:

  {
    "data:image/png;base64,iVBORw0KGgoAAAANSUhEUgAAAlgAAAJYCAMAAACJuGjuAAAAB3RJTUUH1wUHFDcZeZsypgAAAuhQTFRFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA////Qi+Y8wAAAPZ0Uk5TAAECAwQFBgcICQoLDA0ODxAREhMUFRYXGBkaGxwdHh8gIiMkJSYnKCkqKywtLi8wMTIzNDU2Nzg5Ozw9Pj9AQkNERUZHSElKS0xNTk9QUVJTVFVWV1hZWltdXl9gYWJjZGVmZ2hpa2xtbm9wcXJzdHV2d3h5ent8fX5/gIGCg4SFhoeIiYqLjI2Oj5CRk5SVlpeYmZqbnJ2en6ChoqOkpaanqKmqq6ytrq+wsbO0tba3uLm6u7y9vr/AwcPExcbHyMnKy8zNzs/Q0dLT1NXW19jZ2tvc3d7f4OHj5OXm5+jp6uvs7e7v8PHy8/T19vf4+fr7/P3+Fp6kQgAAAAFiS0dE96vcevcAAAslSURBVHja7d35l5Z1HcdhhxFBFAFzwSbJVARJRZZwCVNcSCgKwQVNoyAVMxXRRMsd09Rc0ijFhZIplyI1d5Rc0jRSUdxCEAQ0EFAGZp7Pz3mOdVKTgOF7e9/PPdf1B3x/+LxfZzjzMDAbbAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAC1M3Xn1H3aJi5DAnresjI+Y4Sasr41GPBEfJyzW09ZnzosQFmn1mrQiQlgkteEhD8dqCIvm+sy42RHCIq0vXrs8Qlgk1WrwfZUIYZHUZie+HGsiLNbRjle8EyEskqo54I9NEcIiqU2+93ysJWGxtra7+J8RwiKtfW5tjBAWSbX99jOxboTFGtWdtyBCWKS1x69XRgiLpDY64vFoFmGxeluNfyNCWKTV6/oVEcIiqdpDpsX6EBafoNOpsyOERVo9rlkeISySajXo3kqEsEhqs++/FEkIi//a8WdLIoRFUjX7T22KEBZJbTL6uUhJWLzv8z95O0JYpLXP7xojhEVSbY75a2RAWC3bZ89dECEs0uo3eWWEsEiq9RGPRXaE1UJtOX5uhLBIq+d1KyKERVK1Qx+KzAmrpek09h8RwiKt7tcsixAWSbU6+J5KhLBIqv0Js+LTI6wWYofLl0QIi6RqBvyhKUJYJNVu9LPxqRNW2XW56K0IYZFW/982RgiLpNoc/VTkRViltc05b0YIi7S+NLkhQlgk1fqwRyNnwiqfLc+YEyEs0trtV+9FCIukar/xUBSDsEqk4ymvRQiLtLr9fFmEsEiq1Vf/VIkQFkm1P35WFIywqt/2ly2JEBZJ1ez3+6YIYZFUu1F/j2ISVhXrMmFRhLBIa+/6VRHCIqk233oqCk1Y1ajz2fMjhEVafW9uiBAWSbU+9M9RDYRVVbY4fU6EsEhr11++FyEskqod8mBUEWFVh44nvxohLNLqdtWyCGGRVM3AuysRwiKp9se9GNVIWIX2hUsXRwiLtPa7oylCWCS18XdnRBUTVjFte+GiCGGR1l5TVkUIi6TaHPVkVD9hFUznH8+LEBZp9bmxIUJYJNV6+PQoDWEVxRanvR4hLNLaZeK7EcIiqVZD7o+yEVbuOpz0aoSwSGunK5dGCIukag66qxIhLJLa9LgXorSElZ+rEuy3cuErbzcKiw+7ej12e2v6pB8O79W53Qdf+roOP//uFcJivcJafP9Fw7b7hG8uj5raJCyaF9bcyaO616z+U9bbK8JiXcOad/N3uq7pyb7PC4t1CGvVtNN3r1mbN9tNFJaw1nKjOROHdlj7V49pFJaw1uzZ8/vWrNuzIxqFJaz/q+mRsTs2493DK8IS1mo1Pnjs1s18+AJhCWs1X6umHd+5+Q/XPiAsYf2vyiMn1K3fy1svEpawPmbmGdut/9PHCktYH/kQ9LLeSZ6ufVpYwvqPd28+qDbV218WlrD+/eH6L+pSPv6AsIT1vneu7Jr28QOFJax4fsxmqR+veU5YLTyseZf1yeL1UcJqyWEtveHA2mxe77hCWC01rJVTD984u+dvF1YL1WeLTJ8/VFhkod0yYZGFO4VFFk4RFlnoKSyy0GqhsMjCrcIiC+OFRRYGCossdBYWmXhDWGThTmGRhSuERRZOEBZZGCQssrCzsMhC2yZhkYX5wiILfxMWWbhXWGThJmGRhZ8KiyyMFRZZGCkssnCosMjCwcIiC3sLiyz0FBZZ2EFYZKGzsMhCB2EhLIQlrJattbDIhLAQFsISlrCEhbAQlrCEJSyEhbCEJSxhISyEJSxhCQthISxhCUtYCAthCUtYwkJYCEtYwhIWwkJYwhKWsBAWwhKWsISFsBCWsIQlLISFsIQlLGEhLIQlLGEJC2EhLIQlLISFsBCWsBAWwkJYwkJYCAthCQthISyEJSyEhbAQlrAQFsJCWMJCWAgLYQkLYSEshCUshIWwEJawEBbCQljCQlgIC2EJC2EhLIQlLISFsBCWsBAWwkJYwkJYCAthCQthISyEJSxhCQthISxhCUtYCAthCUtYwkJYCEtYwhIWwkJYwhKWsBAWwhKWsISFsBCWsIQlLISFsIQlLGEhLIQlLGEJC2EhLGEJS1gIC2EJS1jCQlgIS1jCEhbCQlgIS1gIC2EhLGEhLISFsISFsBAWwhIWwkJYCEtYCAthISxhISyEhbCEhbAQFsISFsJCWAhLWAgLYSEsYSEshIWwhIWwEBbCEhbCQlgIS1gIC2EhLGEhLISFsISFsBAWwhIWwkJYCEtYwhIWwkJYwhKWsBAWwhKWsISFsBCWsIQlLISFsIQlLGEhLIQlLGEJC2EhLGEJS1gIC2EJS1jCQlgIS1jCEhbCQljCEpawEBbCEpawhIWwEJawhCUshIWw3F5YwkJYCAthCQthISyEJSyEhbAQlrAQFsJCWMJCWAgLYQkLYSEshCUshIWwEJawEBbCQljCQlgIC2EJC2EhLIQlLISFsBCWsBAWwkJYwkJYCAthCQthISyEJSyEhbAQlrAQFsJCWMJCWAgLYQlLWMJCWAhLWMISFsJCWMISlrAQFsISlrCEhbAQlrCEJSyEhbCEJSxhISyEJSxhCQthISxhCUtYCAthCUtYwkJYCEtYwhIWwkJYwhKWsBAWwhKWsISFsBAWwhIWwkJYCEtYCAthISxhISyEhbCEhbAQFsISFsJCWAhLWAgLYSEsYSEshIWwhIWwEBbCEhafqI2wyEIHYSEshLVGzzl+mXXJLazZji8sYSEsimCn3MKa5/hltktuYS12/DLbVVhkob+wyMLg3MJqcPwyOzK3sMLxy+x4YZGF8fmF1d71S+zi/MKqc/0Sm5hfWN1dv8Tq8wtrD9cvsXvyC+sA1y+xx/ML6xDXL7FZ+YU10vVLbHl+Yf3A9curU35dxY+cv7x65BjWpc5fXgfkGNYNzl9eI3MM617nL68LcgzrWecvryk5hrXI+cvr6RzDijbuX1pL8gyrm/uXVV2eXcVAA5TVwFzDOs4AZXVarmFdYoCyuiXXsKYaoKxm5hrWawYoqc0ruYZV8c8pSmpw5GtPE5TThJzDGm2Ccnok57CuN0EpdViZc1gv2KCUhuXcVVQ2N0IZTco7rPi6EUqo1Zu5h3WVFUpo39y7ipesUELX5R9WbG+G0mm7pABhnWKH0jmsAF3FX+xQOo8WIazYwRAls0chuoqzLVEyU4oR1hutTVEqOzcWI6wYbotSua0gXcXDtiiTfpWihBX7W6M8ah8rTFcx3RzlMSYKZJA9ymLbpUUK69W2FinJH4TTolDONUk5XFisrqJhd5uUwdcqBQsrXtjUKiX4pGF5FM6NZql6XRdEAZ1mmGrv6vUidhWVEaapar3mRzE1DDVOFRuwJIqq8UjzVKuacauiuCpjLVSdOt0RxfabTYxUhYbMjaKbsZuZqs029VEFGs7a0FTVZNNzlkZ1eMaPZ1WPdmMWRPW4q4fFqsJWZy+MqtJ0Wz+rFf4Thv7XvxfV58Hhfh1KkXU78+WoUgsv9bM0Bf1a1e/CmVHVXp7Qt8aOxdJ1dP2CKIE3Jx/9OWsWQ/uvnHrrnCiRV24a09unW3mq7Tr0rPqZjVFCDU9NOmm/OhN/ujas6zP4xCvufLEhSm7Z01POGz1o984mz1DHbbv3P/zEi264e8b8SrQwDbOn118+dsTBe/Wo89fWzdSzd+99Bwz45rBhI0eNOnnc6ROuvun2+558ce47wQdWLpj1xD3111454dxxJ406ZtiQAfv09l9urYXF0llnfludsIQlLGEJS1gIS1jCEpawhIWwhCUsYQlLWAhLWMISlrCEhbCEJSxhCUtYCEtYwhLWmvwLSXVhasGvDwIAAAAASUVORK5CYII=" : "FUCK YOU!"
  }
  • Always think through how one can reference objects from your json rather than forcing them to fuck around and bind shit manually. That’s a nutjob and I demand more cash to work on these shit.

Cylon.js Workshop

Hardware workshop has a lot of pitfall… Things just stop working the moment you give it to other people



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Published

24 January 2016

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